In the middle of the night...

Let's start this with a question. Have you ever had a nightmare about your kid(s)? Not just any nightmare, like losing your kid(s) at the circus while monkeys wearing top hats are chasing you with rubber ducks. I mean a terrifying, gruesome, vivid nightmare. A nightmare you can't seem to wake up from but when you do you are completely confused and wondering how in hell you could dream something like that! Now, let's be clear, I've had dreams like this before but they were usually about another adult, like my husband or ex-boyfriend. I really wasn't that confused afterward. 

I don't know that much about dreams and where they come from. I can't interpret them. I don't think anyone really can. Check it out for yourself. Look up dreams on the Internet just to see the number of theories that exist. 

I like to believe that each dream is different and can be very personal. Here's what I mean:

1. Happiness, excitement: Could be shown in a dream about seeing your baby's face through your pregnant belly

2. Revenge, anger: Noted by a natural disaster killing off family and/or friends, anyone that has wronged or hurt you

3. Fear: Watching a stranger attack your loved one could reflect this

4. Sorrow, grief, regret: Simply seeing the image of someone you've wronged or miss could be an indicator

5. self-pity, self-loathing, introversion: You, as the dreamer, becoming involved in activities that prove harmful, emotionally or physically, to yourself could be reflected.

These of course, are my own ideas. So, after dreaming of my son last night, I needed to "discuss" it. I can't get into much detail, as they fade over time. I can give you the gist. My family and I were at a store with a few other people. A man and a woman try to rob it but it goes awry. I manage to escape with my cell phone. Everyone else is locked in the store. I'm sitting in a car, hiding my phone and waiting for the opportunity to call for help. It slips. The woman sees. I grab it and run. She runs into the store. I walk to the back of the store. Many people and cops are there. They shoot her several times. My son comes around the corner, surprising the cops, and is shot. He didn't die. I woke up before that could happen. I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night.

I questioned myself as a mother, as a human being. How could I! Why would I dream such a thing and about my own child? I still don't know. But I do think it has everything to do with how much I worry about him and how, sometimes, I feel like there is nothing I can do to help him. Am I crazy or just a normal, stressed out, working mom?